Relive each delicious moment of the TV adaptation of A Discovery of Witches with our weekly recap. This week? A Discovery of Witches Episode 2.

Do you ever find yourself yelling at the screen in front of you or mumbling cheeky responses to the characters while watching a show? We do. Sometimes we keep those responses to ourselves and, sometimes, Ashley and I text them to each other as we watch the same show at the same time 700 miles apart. We enjoy these conversations so much that we decided to share them with you. Each week, Ashley and I will publish an episode recap for the first season of A Discovery of Witches. You can read it while you rewatch the episode (because you know you’re going to rewatch it) or just read it. There’s no right or wrong way to do this, just do it. We hope that these recaps will be worth a few giggles for A Discovery of Witches fans and that they might even make you think twice about what you’ve just watched.

[0:00] Perfume ad? Armani? United Colors of Benetton? Whatever it is, I’ll take two. We also love this version of the Rabitt.

[1:00] I was just in Venice two years ago and I don’t remember this possibility being mentioned in any of the Trip Advisor comments.

[2:00] Don’t ever leave me, pseudo Matthew because I’d find you. This is the most disturbing game of hide and seek that I’ve ever witnessed.

[3:00] Hamish’s house might look like a wedding cake, but I would choose that over Satu’s haunted forest any day of the week.

[4:00] Matthew’s craving Diana like I crave salty snacks, although my hankerings have never driven me to exile in Scotland. I need to be like Matthew: fewer corn chips, more Scottish countryside.

[5:00] Listen, Peter Parker, I’m going to need for you and your super spider dreams to knock it off. I quite like sleeping and you’re attempting to railroad that for me.

[6:00] Do we think he washed that himself? Went to a laundromat? Used unscented detergent? A dryer sheet? I have questions, but I’m always in favor of any male who knows how to fold laundry with perfect military corners.

[7:00] Domenico is such a beautiful creature that I don’t imagine he hears the word “no” a lot. Women, fellow creatures, orange-smocked Italian coroners — all vulnerable to his charm. “He was French.” Yes, he smelled that. Stop boring Domenico with your simple, human observations and tell him something he doesn’t already know.

[8:00] I can’t decide if I feel worse for the human that Juliette hunted or this poor stag that Matthew is literally running to death.

[9:00] My favorite time of year on a university campus is when students “aren’t back yet.”

[10:00] It’s the stag. My sympathies are definitely with him. At least he had the good sense to know when he’d been bested by another creature.

[11:00] I admire Diana’s commitment to “The Bod.” By this point, three creature encounters in, I’d be camped out at a Starbucks trying to get that damn paper written.

[12:00] Matthew’s post-stag glow looks a hell of a lot like when I exit the all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. I get it. Given the amount of time we also spend watching Outlander, it’s difficult to see these shots of Scotland and not imagine a band of rugged Jacobites riding majestic horses down one of those hillsides. Vampires and Jacobites and Daemons oh my.

[13:00] What was on the page? A picture. What did it look like? *shows him her hand *

[14:00] Knox just told Satu to use “firmer tactics.” We’ve already seen her off one poor soul by creating a human-sized sinkhole. Is he thinking of something firmer than that?

[15:00] I feel Juliette’s pain here. As a former misbehaved child, the idea of someone who knew of my ill deeds showing up at the door and asking to speak to my father would have been terrifying.

[16:00] We ran Gillian’s answer through Google translate. “These things get out” translates to “I told them. I told them everything. I’m a terrible friend. I’m really sorry. I will continue to eat this biscuit and pretend it is my guilt.”

[17:00] I occasionally find the differences between American and British universities difficult to navigate. It’s nice to know that “one of the dean’s awful parties” is understood universally. So many cheese cubes and pretending to have read that journal article…

[18:00] I haven’t seen anyone this anxious for the results of a blood test since Maury Povich saw dollar signs in every one he did for all those “Who’s Your Daddy” episodes.

[19:00] Satu’s eye-rolling and chanting would be a great party trick. I may also attempt this at my next staff meeting.

[20:00] I inherently feel calmer whenever Aunt Em comes on screen. I don’t know if it’s the angelic glow that accompanies her, her voice that sounds like human Xanax, the serene country setting or, D, all of the above.

[21:00] Gerbert isn’t mad, he’s just disappointed. No wait, he’s definitely mad.

[22:00] You know, my dad’s been both disappointed and mad at me and I truly don’t remember this reaction following either of those emotions.

[23:00] Young lady, YOU GO TO YOUR ROOM; your bizarrely puddled and reinforced room.

[24:00] “There is more to the game than protecting your queen.” This is one of our favorite lines from the books and we are so happy to see it on the screen. Also, it turns out the queen can protect her own damn self, eventually anyway.

[25:00] All this talk about the bewitched Ashmole 782 — it comes up, it sees its shadow, it goes away for indefinite amounts of time. I’m starting to think this damn book is Punxsutawney Phil and we’re stuck in Groundhog Day.

[26:00] We interrupt this recap to let you know that Prince’s lyrics are now playing on a loop in our heads. “Maybe she’s just like her mother…this is what it sounds like when doves cry.” As you were.

[27:00] As if it’s not enough that this poor woman is being followed by a Noah’s Ark of creatures, she’s now got Peter Knox, literally, in her head.

[28:00] I would really love to see the aftermath of the broken window. [story book narrator voice] And from that day forward, no one ever called his parties “awful” again.

[29:00] Yes, that is Peter Knox in my kitchen, but wait, it’s not what you think! Actually, it’s exactly what you think, but don’t go… I’ve got more biscuits!

[31:00] Despite Hamish’s warning and Diana’s skeptical hesitancy, this glance down the stairwell, eyes locked on each other is the point of no return for these two. They’re exhaling in acknowledgment and so are we, among other reasons.

[32:00] Is that my heartbeat? Is it Diana’s heartbeat? I’m so confused!

[33:00] I love this one degree of separation game that Matthew and Diana play. Next up, Darwin!

[34:00] Matthew’s been searching for a book since 1859. Did he check Amazon? Go Prime, Matthew…it comes in 48 hours or less!

[35:00] Note to self: I must work harder to color match my wardrobe to my interior decor. Next level stuff, I tell you. Also, Matthew does laundry and automatically senses when you are cold. He is shaping up to be the perfect man.

[36:00] Just exactly which type of doctor greets patients by sniffing them? Not one I’d pay repeat visits to, but we’re willing to give Dr. Marcus a pass.

[37:00] Unrelated but worth mentioning: Miriam’s top knot is top notch. That is all.

[38:00] RNA, DNA, markers…blah….blah…blah…just keep looking at me with those eyes, Dr. Clairmont. I might have done better in science if it had looked like this.

[39:00] “All the magic has seeped out of the world… and everyone will be the same.” Please stay the course, Dr. Clairmont, and prevent this from happening, for all our sakes.

[40:00] Diana went from “I don’t want to talk about it” to “fine, I’ll tell you everything” in the space of 30 seconds.

[41:00] That kiss on the wrist though. Did it suddenly get hot in here?

Nikki’s final thoughts: This recap was particularly fun because we got to write it together, in the same room, at Janet’s house — three Witchy Women (and a bonus witchy friend) enjoying the thing that has brought us so much joy and drawn us closer as friends over the last year. It was a magical kind of evening. But about the show, I find myself falling for these characters all over again. Seeing the story from the perspective of other characters, not just through Diana’s eyes has given me a level of sympathy for Juliette, Gillian, and Satu that I did not think possible. I find myself rooting for these strong women kept under the thumbs of powerful men. Even though these vantage points are departures from the books, I believe that they cut to the heart of Deborah’s stories. We’re all different, we’re all struggling in different ways, but we all need each other if we’re going to survive.

Ashley’s final thoughts: WE WROTE THIS RECAP IN THE BISHOP HOUSE. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the Bishop House, but it was as damn close to it as I’ll ever get. It was full of family and friends from all different backgrounds and walks of life all snuggled together in a home that provided us a place to gather, expanded to make us fit and loved on us as if it were a living, breathing thing. Watching this episode of A Discovery of Witches together within its walls was just the icing on the cake, and co-writing this recap with Nikki just two inches from me was the healthy dose of sprinkles glittering the top layer. I can’t imagine Deb wished for anything different when she dreamed up these beautifully rich characters and the stories that bind them together, and when she green lighted the development of a TV show to bring them to life in a different way. We assure you, Deb, it was a wish come true for us as well.

What was your favorite scene in Episode 2? 
What, if anything, could you have done without?

If you’ve missed any of our A Discovery of Witches recaps, do not fret! You can find all of our Season 1 recaps here.

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